Chapter 160 A Suicide Note

"Originally, the first place belonged to a foreign contestant. However, following instructions, we eliminated connections and bribery to ensure the scores were awarded fairly. The Madam missed first place by a mere single point. Yet tomorrow, she will take the world by storm with her art exhibition, and domestic platforms will offer her even grander projects and events. The Madam is truly extraordinary; breaking through such heavy siege is a testament to her innate genius."

Fu Yanyan felt a mix of profound joy and agonizing heartache, a sensation of freezing and burning simultaneously. He no longer harbored extravagant hopes, nor dared to entertain them. Life was like a game of chess, where impermanence was the only constant. From childhood to this day, the one thing he desired most was a single beating heart belonging to Ah-Hua.

His past blind tolerance and compromise had nearly cost him the love of his life. Later, he began resorting to any means necessary to claim that love, only for her to find it unbearable. It is my fault... Ah-Hua, everything is my fault.

He unlocked her phone, gazed at that sequence of digits, and his expression darkened into a scowl.

"Investigate the exact IP address of this number. Do it with maximum speed."

"Understood."

The car plunged back into a dead silence, the very wind outside growing still and oppressive.

Just by catching sight of the shadowed half of his boss's face, the assistant could vividly feel the man's torment.

Not a single tear fell, nor a single word was uttered. Time had once acted against his nature, carving deep, unforgettable lessons into him with blades that drew blood, leaving Fu Yanyan seemingly incapable of weeping. Buddhas do not shed tears, and neither did he, striving toward a state of detachment.

Yet three years ago, his heart had shattered into pieces, and he wept. A single woman had utterly broken this indomitable man who would rather die than submit.

Fu Yanyan found success in the marketplace, but defeat in the realm of the heart.

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Zhong Huayan felt dizzy and lightheaded, her dreams mimicking a kaleidoscope. She ran desperately, yet no matter where she turned, countless women who looked just like her appeared. Unable to escape, she could only cover her eyes and bury her face as she wept bitterly. A suffocating sensation gripped her entire body, accompanied by a sharp pain at the back of her head—much like sleep paralysis, where she could neither cry out nor draw breath. Only when the text message alert chimed from the nearby phone did it shatter the nightmare.

She looked around the sprawling room in a daze.

As she prepared to step out of bed, she felt the cold constraint of a shackle fastened around her ankle, binding her to the bedpost. This was no ordinary wooden bed; a single glance told her that without the key, she would need heavy tools just to saw through it.

She was on the verge of tears.

Lying back on the bed with a sense of mental exhaustion, she felt that life had truly become unbearable, plunging her into deep self-doubt...

Staring at the face in the mirror bearing a ninety-percent resemblance to her own, she realized... this was her very own body!

She laughed, half in amusement and half in despair.

Picking up her phone, she looked at an image sent from an unknown number.

It was a picture of a letter.

Reading it word by word, an indescribable pain spread through her entire body. This was a young man's confession, delivered far too late. The handwriting undeniably belonged to Xu Chuyin. The phone number of the sender was obscured, likely dispatched by Xu Yaochuan.

[A Will: I do not know what I ought to call you? Li Yanyan, or Zhong Huayan? This is perhaps the first love letter I have ever written, and it may well serve as my last testament. Knowing that my days are numbered, I cannot foresee when or where I will depart. This brief life of mine has likely known its share of madness, desolation, happiness, and pain. In the end, I could never pinpoint when I became utterly unable to forget you. Words fail to capture such emotion.

I can only vaguely remember that you once bloomed; for a fleeting moment, your vitality opened my eyes to the world and enlightened me. It was like swimming through murals at the bottom of the water, haunting me day and night like a phantom or a demon, robbing me of sleep. When those hands gripped my throat, despite being surrounded by water, I saw the tears falling like rain from your eyes, your heart weeping.

Just as a wave of guilt and heartache washed over me, I had yet to recognize my own budding feelings. It wasn't until that melody of the Nanke Dream lingered in my mind, compelling me to cast aside Xu Yuan's hatred for you, that I realized all of this had been destined by the subtle workings of fate.

I recalled my old dreams of punishing evil and upholding the righteous, unwilling to let my mother die in vain. Thank you for teaching me that the passing years must never dull one's original aspirations. I attained status and wealth, yet I betrayed myself.

I was unwilling to watch my brother sink deeper into error; what I always yearned for was a life of warmth. To them, it was cowardice and weakness, but to me, my life's lesson had been completed. I could have let go of everything, yet you pierced the darkness of my heart like a beacon of the past, making it impossible for me, for all eternity, to calmly and serenely release this youthful, reckless, and abyssal infatuation.

If there is an afterlife, and you still wish to see me, I believe that will be the happiest and most beautiful of days. Following you was like chasing a beam of light. My dear, I love you. May the world treat you with gentleness, may you fulfill your grand ambitions, and may the years never erode your original intent.]

Zhong Huayan finished reading through a blur of tears.

Xu Chuyin must have found release from everything, hence leaving behind this final testament.

Zhong Huayan did not know whether the real Li Yanyan would ever forgive the harm Xu Chuyin had once caused. Yet, Zhong Huayan herself had already let it go.

Youthful folly ultimately left behind a ground littered with scars. Once the wounds scabbed over and everything was laid to rest, she swallowed the pain.

Karmic ties arise, and karmic ties dissolve.

Such is the way of all people; where there is no affinity, there is no need to meet.

Even a baleful bond was still a bond, profound and unforgettable. She had never considered herself in love with Xu Chuyin, but she would forever admire those capable of acknowledging their wrongs and mending their ways.

If there were a next life, she would certainly go to meet him.

Her soul refused to squander him any longer; she sent him off on his journey. Xu Chuyin, may all be well with you.

Lin Hongshu, may the hardships of the next life find me instead of you. I shall take good care of your family. You must forget everything, live a joyful life, and instead of a wretched soul burdened by the world, become a free and untethered immortal.

Zhong Huayan dragged the silver shackle on her ankle. The chain was only a few meters long, just barely reaching the doorway.

This tragedy had begun with her, and it would end with her. The bloody storm of a war had commenced; she would not easily compromise. She would stand until the very end, possessing the unyielding posture of the strong deep within her bones—a stubborn, unbending spirit that had never known defeat.

She would not abandon Fu Yanyan. It was her fault... Ah-Yan, that you have become this way is my fault as your elder... It is my failure to guide you properly, and it is the Zhong family that owes you...

From beginning to end, she had never once thought of leaving Fu Yanyan.

They were childhood sweethearts, kindred spirits who offered each other warmth—a significance that no one else could ever replace.

Yet, she hated... she hated his arbitrariness, hated that he failed to consider the future, hated that his eyes were blinded by desire and resentment, dragging the Buddha-like figure off his pedestal into the abyss. He ought to have been the revered Buddha worshipped by all directions, catching every eye, standing high and untouchable. A paragon of great benevolence in the world—how could he endure the condemnation of the world after all his efforts, having his reputation destroyed, facing public revulsion and infamy for ages to come? Fu Yanyan might not care, but she cared! Her Ah-Yan should stand tall and unshakable for all eternity; the first half of his life had been far too bitter. Her youthful kindness had become the strength he leaned upon, dragging him step by step to where he was today.

Zhong Huayan pushed open the door. Upon seeing her, the housekeeper immediately walked over and brought the meal to her table.