Chapter 40: Peace of Mind

Ugh...

In the past, Shen Tuabai might have kept up the facade, but today she was simply too exhausted. Continuing to pretend would have disgusted even herself.

Li Tinghan clearly noticed Shen Tuabai's fatigue and impatience. Although he still had many questions, he was perceptive enough to choose to remain silent.

The carriage jolted all the way, but the child in Shen Tuabai's belly gradually quieted down and stopped fussing. Shen Tuabai breathed a sigh of relief and, leaning against Chunchan, drifted off to sleep.

It was not until dawn, just as they crossed out of Lingzhou's borders, that the driver stopped at a post station and woke her.

Shen Tuabai had not been sleeping deeply to begin with; she had simply wanted to avoid interacting with Li Tinghan.

As soon as they reached the post station, she and Chunchan coordinated to reveal their identities as members of the Prince of Yan's estate, recounting the whole sequence of events. This successfully persuaded the local station official to assign them a squad of guards.

In addition, they secured two fast horses and an experienced driver, ensuring there would be someone to take turns even if they traveled day and night.

These people would accompany them all the way to Chang'an, and unless the people in Lingzhou were fully prepared to commit treason, the pursuit should end here.

"Eat your meal, and we'll set off immediately," Shen Tuabai commanded, and everyone sprang into action.

Having spent the entire night in the carriage, the three children had lost their initial novelty; now, with pale faces, their expressions turned bitter at the mere mention of getting back into a carriage after eating.

Shen Tuabai had no magic cure for this and could only offer soft words of comfort.

Only after finishing all these tasks did Shen Tuabai remember that Li Tinghan was still by her side. Had he simply produced his imperial token and spoken a word, they wouldn't have had to go to such lengths to prove their identities.

Li Tinghan said nothing about this. Ever since last night, his gaze had remained fixed on Shen Tuabai, and he painfully realized that he had never truly known her before.

Even without him, she could manage quite well on her own. In fact, if he hadn't been injured, Shen Tuabai could have fled even faster without having to drag along a grown man.

Everything Shen Tuabai had just done reminded Li Tinghan of someone: his mother, the current Empress Regnant.

Clearly, his mother had never allowed herself to fall into such a desperate and disheveled state, yet Li Tinghan felt certain that if his mother were here, she would have comforted everyone just as Shen Tuabai had, enabling each person to perform their duties efficiently.

Here, it seemed he was the only redundant one.

Thinking of this, Li Tinghan's heart skipped a beat.

He had grown up deep within the palace, preferring a carefree life of wandering clouds and wild cranes, unconcerned with fame and fortune. But that did not mean he was truly ignorant of everything.

He had two elder brothers above him; regardless of which of them was to become emperor or crown prince, his mother had always remained seated behind that pearl curtain, watching them closely.

A major reason Li Tinghan was unwilling to get entangled in the struggle for the succession was that he did not want to live under his mother's control.

Yet, having just witnessed Shen Tuabai acting in a manner so reminiscent of his mother, he felt no sense of aversion at all; instead, a faint warmth stirred within him.

His mother's biological father had been merely a low-ranking official of the fifth rank. When she entered the palace, her maternal grandfather had already passed away, making her initial days in the imperial court extremely difficult.

He was the youngest son, born after his mother had already become empress, but he vaguely remembered that the imperial palace back then had been equally unstable.

Even at his tender age, he had sensed that something was amiss during several major crises of his early childhood.

Back then, the imperial guards had surrounded the Ganlu Hall layer upon layer, yet he had still been able to play happily with the eunuchs and maids. Upon reflection, the reason he had remained so composed back then was not because he was naturally steady, but because of his mother.

When his mother sat at her desk with a book in hand, everyone in the Ganlu Hall found their anchor. With her present, nothing could possibly go wrong. Not only did he believe this, but everyone in the Ganlu Hall believed it too.

For a long period during his childhood, as long as his mother was there, Li Tinghan felt secure.

After growing up, Li Tinghan had once been perplexed: his mother was overbearing, strong-willed, and covetous of power; why had his imperial father bestowed his entire heart upon her, even ranking her children separately—a move that unmistakably implied the throne would fall only to the offspring of the two of them?

Yet now, Li Tinghan understood a little. Perhaps what his father had craved was precisely this tiny thread of peace of mind, the reassurance that somehow, everything would be resolved.

Throughout the remainder of the journey, Li Tinghan kept that same intense gaze fixed on Shen Tuabai, making it impossible for her to ignore, even if she wanted to.

Under Shen Tuabai's fervent prayers, the small group traveled day and night and finally reached Chang'an.

Perhaps she had released her pent-up breath too completely; before she had even stepped foot inside the city gates of Chang'an, Shen Tuabai went into labor. "Chunchan... Chunchan..."

Although Shen Tuabai had meticulously cared for her body as the head wet nurse instructed and was even certain she would give birth smoothly, now that the moment was upon her, she could not help but be terrified.

The moment her water broke, she felt as though she had lost control over her body, and panic overwhelmed her entirely.

"I'm here, Mistress, I'm here," Chunchan grasped her hand. But Chunchan was even younger than Shen Tuabai and had never given birth before. Aside from holding her hand, she panicked as well, having no idea what to do.

The Feng family had indeed prepared a midwife for her, but she had fled in such haste that she hadn't brought the midwife along!

Everyone was at a loss, and to make matters worse, they were currently stuck in the queue to enter the city. The carriage remained motionless for a long time, drawing complaints from the people behind them, while the guards watching the city gates began shouting impatiently.

Li Tinghan finally found a way to make himself useful; he quickly dismounted and revealed his identity to the crowd.

After a wave of contractions, Shen Tuabai gradually regained her composure. During her pregnancy, she had countless times inquired about the birthing process from experienced midwives.

Although this was her first time, she knew her stuff!

Shen Tuabai instructed Chunchan: "Tell the driver to clear the way so we don't hold up others. Take a pouch of silver and go ask if there are any physicians or midwives in the crowd—even women who have given birth before will do."

"With heavy rewards come brave souls. Find a few people to fetch hot water, and make sure they wash their hands thoroughly before assisting with the birth. Buy candles, scissors, and a fire starter—buy them at any price..."

Shen Tuabai rattled off a long list of instructions, and everyone inside the carriage, including the three children, sprang into motion.

Another contraction struck, and Shen Tuabai grabbed Chunchan's hand. "It seems I am destined to give birth in this carriage today. Tell the driver to watch the horses and ensure they don't move easily. Have the guards surround the carriage so no one crashes into it. My life is entirely in your hands now."

Chunchan nodded heavily, passing down the instructions just as a woman who had previously given birth stepped forward timidly, holding a pair of scissors.

Shen Tuabai went straight to the point: "Have you washed your hands?"

The woman nodded timidly, her hands shaking uncontrollably.

Shen Tuabai reassured her: "Don't be afraid. My baby loves me the most and will surely be born safely. You won't need to do much else; just hold the scissors over the fire to sterilize them, cut the umbilical cord the moment the baby is born, and then wrap the baby up. Do you understand?"